++the one with the health

July2022.

I know someone once told me, how u begin your year will determine how’s your year going. He meant on the health part. 

And so do i.

My january was a bad lung days especially after covid.

It doesnt stop. The athma attack went on and off even after weeks from the first attack.

This time it was so different.

On and off

On and off

And we went to scotland (again for me) on May.

It was ok. The weather doesnt trigger my athma attack. Except when sleeping, ofcourse because of the head and lung position i think.

After scotland, the heat difference totally tolled me.

I was feeling like i wanna die already on the day that i went to the clinic.

Drove, parked, cough and vomit again there and then. Just beside the car.

When i entered the clinic, i was already at the tip of bursting my throat.

I dunno about everyone else, but apparently steroids are today’s remedy.

6pills a day.

Again after the full cycle completed, ok, and i didnt count, the athma attack came in, on and off again.

Now i am again at the new cycle of that steroid pills.

Wish me luck.

currently listening to:dewa

currently feeling: ok abit
i wanna be:healthy

++the one with a melancholic night

So here i am, writing on this empty wall at 2-ish am.

I dunno whats going on with my sleep pattern nowadays, but some days like today, that insomnia thingy hit me.

Im writing from my phone now so pls bear with me.

Currently listening to payung teduh - utk perempuan yg sedang didlm pelukan.

Shit im never getting tired of this song really.

My mood and emotion was like a haywire nowadays i reckon.

Like tonite, like why i am feeling all melodramatic fool like a broken hearted teenager like i just fall out of love like it was yesterday nih? Hah? Hishhhhh!

Even vivi agrees with me, he normally sneak into my room to sleep (normally because he loves me, actually because he wanted to escape kakashi & netzuko, those 2 little brats are at their kitties age, naughty as hell).

But not tonite. Tonite, like he can hear me emo-ing inside, he chose to ignore me whenever i open my door.

He just sit still at the toilet door, dont even bother to look at me. How ungrateful! But still, i’ll go to him and kiss him. 

Bak kata people in fb-page “kucing sepahkan apa hari ini”, kakak dah kene sifir (sihir) kucing.

Another story for another post.

Back to vivi, yup, tonite he ditch me, making me felt more melancholic all by myself. Begittuh.

I should just stop.

All this emo writing will only make people in hiatus with me, taking all the laughing credits.

currently listening to:payung teduh - utk perempuan yg sedang didlm pelukan
currently feeling:mellowy
i wanna be:happy again

++ the one with year 2022

haha muncul2 dok share video2 youtube jer.

mengundang kecaman si mmtk je kan?

so what's up people?

im currently unwell and on hiatus and craves for so many things.

i was reading the twitter timeline yesterday that a phrase catch me and get to me and i was like stressing over the fact that it is so true and it reads like this:

tom hardy once said: "Being alone for a while is dangerous. It's addicting. Once you see how peaceful it is, you dont even want to deal with people anymore"

KANNNNNNN!!!!

shit man.

i think, i feel, like, i am at that stage.

eh tak tak. tak kot. eh entahlah.

currently listening to:driver's license
currently feeling:unwell
i wanna be:in scotland!

Alvin Jonathan, Berhasil Membuat Judika Jatuh Hati - X Factor Indonesia ...

alvin jonathan <3 <3 <3

Daniel, Thomas, Roby, Maydea & Alvin - TALKING TO THE MOON (Bruno Mars)...

semuaaaaaaaaaaa bestttttttttttttttt

MAYDEA - DRIVERS LICENSE (Olivia Rodrigo) - X Factor Indonesia 2021

DRIVERS LICENSE (Olivia Rodrigo)

Lyrics

I got my driver's license last week
Just like we always talked about
'Cause you were so excited for me
To finally drive up to your house
But today I drove through the suburbs
Crying 'cause you weren't around

And you're probably with that blonde girl
Who always made me doubt
She's so much older than me
She's everything I'm insecure about
Yeah, today I drove through the suburbs
'Cause how could I ever love someone else?

And I know we weren't perfect but I've never felt this way for no one
And I just can't imagine how you could be so okay now that I'm gone
Guess you didn't mean what you wrote in that song about me
'Cause you said forever, now I drive alone past your street

And all my friends are tired
Of hearing how much I miss you, but
I kinda feel sorry for them
'Cause they'll never know you the way that I do, yeah
Today I drove through the suburbs
And pictured I was driving home to you

Red lights, stop signs

I still see your face in the white cars, front yards

Can't drive past the places we used to go to
'Cause I still fuckin' love you, babe (ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh)
Sidewalks we crossed
I still hear your voice in the traffic, we're laughing
Over all the noise
God, I'm so blue, know we're through
But I still fuckin' love you, babe (ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh)